The rejection letter

by Carole Martin
Monster Contributing Writer

If so, you know the disappointment of not being among the stars. Interviewing can resurrect those same feelings if you are not chosen for the job. You have remained upbeat during the process, hoping to get an offer any day, and instead you receive a form letter saying you have not been chosen. If you feel let down, you're not alone.

The letter arrived five days after the interview. Pat knew from the return address she had not been chosen for the position. The letter read, 'Although we were impressed with your experience and credentials, we have chosen a candidate who was a closer match to our needs at this time.' Tears began to well up in her eyes. This was her third rejection in two weeks. 'Nobody is ever going to hire me,' she thought to herself.

What didn't occur to Pat was that more than 100 resumes had been received for the position and that hers was chosen as one of the top 10. She didn't realize she had beaten out more than 90 people to be one of the five candidates interviewed in person. OK, so someone else got the job and she didn't. But it turned out that the person who was chosen had five more years of industry experience. He was a closer match to the job and required less time to get up to speed.

When rejection hits, it may cause multiple feelings and trigger old wounds. Feelings of being ignored or inadequate, powerless, isolated, humiliated or any combination of these emotions is quite typical. You may feel hurt like Pat, or angry and fed up with the way you are being treated. You may feel at your wit's end after being put through the long interview process over and over, only to end up on the rejection list.

Instead of wallowing in self-pity, it's possible to regain power by staying proactive. If you really want to work for a particular company, write a letter stating how disappointed you are the position went to another candidate. Remind them once more of all the positive traits you could bring to the organization. Let them know you are still very interested in working for the company if something should change or open up.

Or you could call and talk to your interviewer if you felt a positive connection. Sometimes you will get an individual who is willing to talk to you about your interview and where you may have fallen short. Taking action will make you feel you at least gave it one more shot. Sometimes things don't work out for the chosen candidate, or the individual changes his mind. You never know what will happen, and you will feel more in control for having done something positive.

Just getting to the interview is a good thing. You were selected above the others. If you are getting second interviews, you are obviously doing something right. Continue to work on your interview skills and after each performance. Just like many other things in your life, the more you do something, the better you get at it. Eventually you will find the right place for you.