Author: Catherine Darroue, Senior Director of Customer Proposition, EMEA, Aetna International
If stress testing the healthcare system and severely impacting the global economy was not enough, COVID-19 has attacked the core of who we are as humans — social beings that need interaction and physical and emotional connections with other humans. So far, albeit difficult, people here in the UAE have responded remarkably to the calls from the local authorities for social distancing. But it’s a time that we will need to navigate very carefully, and be even more mentally resilient, if we want to emerge in one piece.
The good news is that developing mental resilience is a skill, made up of a combination of behaviours, thoughts and actions, that can be learnt and practised. Think of it like a muscle, something that needs to be used for it to grow stronger.
Resilience means being adaptable to stressful and unforeseen circumstances, and having the capacity to bounce back — or perhaps even bounce forward. Certainly, working to develop this quality will enable more of us to roll with the punches and persevere, no matter what the next couple of months bring.
Here are five practical strategies to help you hone your resilience skills.
Social distance and self-isolation might be the current words du jour, but that doesn’t mean we need to stop being sociable. In fact, emotionally isolating yourself from your support network can be detrimental to your overall health and well-being in times of crisis. By our very nature, human beings are social creatures and a sense of belonging, acceptance and community is central to our subjective well-being.
So, social support is a huge factor in bolstering our internal coping capacities — to put this into context, consider that research shows that hills look less steep when we’re standing next to a friend, as opposed to standing alone. Reaching out to people builds emotional resilience, so connect with others as much as you can. Make time to have long chats with friends and family, set up virtual work meetings, and consider joining one of the many online groups that are springing up all over the country.
Be an optimist
When unforeseen or negative events occur, people naturally search for an explanation to make sense of it all and the manner in which you explain these events to yourself really makes a difference. If you want to develop resilience, adopting an optimistic explanatory style is key. This means attributing the current issues to temporary, specific and external causes as opposed to permanent, pervasive and internal ones.
So, rather than seeing the current outbreak as something that will never end, that will negatively affect every area of your life and that leaves you powerless and helpless (which would be considered a pessimistic explanatory style), remind yourself that this will pass and that, while certain areas of your life may well change, you have the inner resources to deal with these as they come and react accordingly.
Eat, sleep, exercise
Stress and anxiety about the unknown creates a physical response as much as an emotional one, so now is the time to focus on positive lifestyle factors where possible. Getting enough sleep, staying hydrated, eating well and finding opportunities to exercise (an obstacle course in the garden with the kids? A yoga YouTube video in the evening before bed?) will all pay dividends when it comes to weathering the current storm.
It can also help to pay attention to what you pay attention to. For example, if a constant influx of negative news is causing you to feel overwhelmed, turn to a few trusted sources and limit yourself to looking at them twice a day.
Set goals and routines
Meaning and achievements are core tenets of well-being but, at the moment, it can feel like there is a cap to what you can actually accomplish. Nonetheless, try to develop small, realistic goals you can work towards while you are at home — whether that’s reading a book that you’ve always wanted to, completing a household task or learning something new online.
Planning and sticking to a new routine might also be something that you want to consider, especially if you are finding the current predicament overwhelming or like many of us are having to balance work with home-schooling kids. Having a routine obviously gives structure to your day, and will help delineate weekdays from weekends. It also creates a sense of safety and predictability that can be very calming.
Doing activities that keep you in the present are a very helpful way of managing anxiety about the future, as they calm down your amygdala, the fight or flight part of the brain triggered by fear and stress. Find a strategy that works for you — prayer or meditation if a spiritual route calls to you, an app such Headspace or myStrength, practising yoga, mindful journaling or colouring, or any other activity you can lose yourself in for a period of time.
You could also try positive psychology strategies that help you focus on the good in your life, such as gratitude or savouring. You might like to try writing down three things you are grateful for at the end of every day, and share these each week with your family during lockdown. Or you might like to take the opportunity to savour and appreciate some of the smaller things in life — actively listening to the birds singing in the morning, noticing the quality of the light as the sun rises, smelling your tea or coffee before taking a sip. Research shows that the ability to savour the moment is positively associated with increased happiness, which in turn fosters the hope and motivation crucial to staying resilient in these unparalleled times.
There is no doubt that these next few weeks are going to test us all mentally. But following these simple steps, will help us build the mental resilience to not just get through this difficult time, but face just about any challenge life might throw at us.